I went to church yesterday... My mind was actually traveling, I kept on thinking about the things that happened the previous week, I kept on wondering why they had to leave all at the same time-leaving me defenseless and empty inside. When it was time for the Priest to give the homily, I stopped those things from invading my mind to give way for God’s words.

For the Homily, he said that "our hearts can understand the things that our mind can't. That's why the Holy Spirit dwells in our hearts, to help us understand and to clear our minds when things become gloomy."

True enough, just like the things that happened to me, I kept on asking God why he took my boyfriend away, but I can't find the reasons why. It has been a week since he left me; a week had gone by without him. Last Friday, Ate Nhel also spoke to me about this matter, 'cause they were very disturbed by the way I act because according to them, I am no longer the Sassy Jenny that they use to know.

Ate Nhel told me that it must be really painful as well for "Panda" to leave, but he had to. "He has his own reasons, but you know, It's hard when yo'’re distant to the one you love, and sometimes, It's much better if you'll let each other go… because if you're meant to be, God will find away to unify you again.", ate Nhel told me, and those words were enough to let me get over the pain.

I pondered on those words… because if I were him, I'd rather run for it and do everything to save our relationship despite of the risks, but I am not him. He has his own reasons why he preferred to end our relationship instead of saving it, and he might be hurting, too but quite not the way I'm hurting.

If you’'e thinking that I hate him for doing this to me, no I don't. I believe that this happened to make the two of us grow stronger, and even If I lost a boyfriend, I'm really hoping that I didn't lose a best friend. One of my closest friends, Ekcha, called me yesterday to check If I’m okay, She even told me that I'm on the right track, living a normal life like how I used to.

Though life will never be the same without him, I have a life when I didn't know him, when I didn't have him, and I was alright. All I have to do is to get back to that place again. My world won't stop just because he stopped loving me, He's just one of the people who'll make a difference in my life, who'll make me stronger, and will eventually leave a mark.

I know, In God's own time, I'll fall in love again, but when that time comes. I'll make sure that it would be to the right person, under the right time, for the right reasons... and that love will be worth all the tears, the pain, and the wait... And I’ll forget I ever cried.

I'm not even wishing for a Prince Charming because He may dance with me all night but He'll let me slip away when the clock hits 12, Superman can even fly me all the way to the moon but He'll leave me to save the world, Spiderman can give me the sweetest kiss but he'll vanish without even goodbye. Peter Pan will fly with me and will take me to other beautiful places but Wendy will always have his heart… Sure Aladdin might be a theft, but He'll take me to a magic carpet ride, but will he stay if he didn’t have genie? So after all, Shrek might be a slimy looking ogre, not even a handsome prince charming material, far from perfect but he'll stay with me forever, even I’m not a perfect princess, He'll appreciate me for who I am, not for what I am.. And we'll be happy forever.

My exboyfriend taught me a lot of things… he taught me how to believe in love, how to keep my self intact, and he showed me that I'm beautiful just the way I am… though I still miss him, I know that he'll be happy in whatever path that he takes, even without me. One day, He'll find his own princess, and I'll be really happy to see him with the right person in his hands... :)

Break ups are never easy, but they make us stronger. It's a part of growing up. It can even make or break you, but if it breaks you, keep in mind that it's not the end of the world, you're heart will now when It's finally home, Believe me, God will surely give you something better, better than what you’re dreaming of.